I Think I Can, I Think I Can

3 Jun

Image by vortran69 via Flickr

Recently, I ran across a thought that really struck a nerve…”When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.” ~African Proverb.  It was in a post about how we are often our own worst critics. 

It is my belief that we should be our own best friends, because if we are not, there will certainly be times that we will have no one 100% in our corner.  And if you can’t be there 100% for yourself, how then can you expect anyone else to do it?

However, in reality, the monologue in our heads, our self-talk, is often sprinkled with the most uncomplimentary judgements about what we do and even who we are.  How does this happen, you ask?  I do not really know, but if you take a look at the messages you were given daily from a very early age it becomes a bit less of a mystery. 

Our parents as well as other relatives, authority figures, friends and acquaintances  sometimes in an effort to keep us safe, from hurt and disappointment, (sometimes not), have told us no, what we are doing is wrong, we are fat, we are lazy, we are clumsy, we are not smart enough we are blah, blah, blah and on and so forth.  These negative messages come in many forms, some straight forward, some wrapped in disguises of thoughtful warnings or friendly suggestions.   I am sure that you can fill in the blank here with more than one of your own examples that come to mind.  As a matter of fact these messages become so internalized that often we do not even recognize that these messages are negative in nature and very harmful for us to point that we prevent ourselves from living life to its full potential.

This realization made me decide that the first step in changing this might lie in becoming aware of my thoughts and whether they are supportive or negative.  And rather than judging myself harshly when I become aware that I am having a negative thought I will just tell myself to stop and replace that thought with something more positive.  Sounds easy… or more accurately it sounds simple, not easy.

If you have attempted an exercise like this before I would love to hear about it and about your results.  If you haven’t perhaps you would like to join me.  If you do, please let me know and share your experience by commenting.

I will continue this challenge to myself by making a commitment not to say anything negative for an entire day.  They say that thoughts lead to deeds, deeds lead to habits, and habits lead to character so perhaps a change in deeds can lead to a change in thoughts and a change in thoughts can lead to living a better life. 



8 Responses to “I Think I Can, I Think I Can”

  1. Andrea June 3, 2011 at 3:26 PM #

    This is something that I continue to work on. Thank you for the post. It is always nice to read more on being one’s own best friend.

    • queenoffamilosity June 4, 2011 at 5:05 AM #

      Andrea, we are all working on it I believe. Maybe that is why they call it a practice.

  2. Joanna Anglin June 7, 2011 at 3:14 PM #

    Thank you Karen – Often tell my children to “Stop taking pot shots at yourself, the rest of the world is lined up to do that every time you step out the door”

  3. Lisa July 4, 2011 at 2:01 AM #

    Wow, this hit’s home. I am going to try this daily!

    • queenoffamilosity July 4, 2011 at 7:59 PM #

      Yes, it hit me as well. Maybe you can share a bit of your journey here in the comments. It is a great way to support each other in our journeys.


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